Laughter affects human physiology in many ways and research indicates humor can have restorative, even regenerative qualities. Laughter actually reduces pain because the body produces pain-killing hormones called endorphins in response to laughter. It also strengthens immune function. A good belly laugh increases production of T-cells, interferon and immune proteins called globulins. And, laughter also decreases the effects of stress. Under stress, the body produces a hormone called cortisol. Laughter significantly lowers cortisol levels and returns the body to a more relaxed state. Maybe health really is a laughing matter. If so, here’s to women living well, living longer and laughing together.
Erma Bombeck:
If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.
Billie Burke:
Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese.
Lily Tomlin:
The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.
Ninety-eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hard-working, honest Americans. It’s the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them.
I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.
No matter how cynical you get, it is impossible to keep up.
Alice Roosevelt Longworth:
If you can’t say anything good about someone, sit right here next to me.
Elizabeth Adamson:
A baby is an alimentary canal with a loud voice at one end and no responsibility at the other.
Elayne Boosler
When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.
Carrie Fisher:
Instant gratification takes too long.
Roseanne Barr:
Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month I can be myself.
I figure if my kids are alive at the end of the day, I’ve done my job.
I know how to do anything. I’m a mom.
Elizabeth Taylor:
The problem with people who have no vices is you can be pretty sure they’re going to have some pretty annoying virtues.
Rita Rudner:
In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.
When I meet a man, I ask myself, ‘Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.
I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
My mother buried three husbands. Two of them were just napping.
Nancy Astor:
I married beneath me. All women do.
Dorothy Parker:
Brevity is the soul of lingerie.
The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant-and let the air out of the tires.
The two most beautiful words in the English language are ‘Check enclosed’.
If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
Helen Rowland:
When you see a married couple coming down the street, the one three steps ahead is the one that’s mad.
Agatha Christie:
An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets, the more interested he is in her.
Americans spend over a billion dollars a year on wrinkle potions to erase or reduce the telltale signs of aging. The quixotic faith reflected by women’s eternal investment in various creamy applications is supported by relentless high-gloss marketing and the highest, if not the most realistic, hopes.
There is good news and bad news, according to Consumer Reports who decided to put product manufacturers claims to the test for the very first time in the magazine’s history.
The bad news, they found, in tests performed in partnership with the French, was that, on average, these products made little difference in the skin’s appearance.
Women may not be able to turn back the clock, but they can slow down the effects of time in small and big ways.
For example, skipping a visit to the eye doctor may be a shortcut to crows feet. Women should have their vision tested every two years-more often if they think their vision has changed. Squinting creates and deepens wrinkles. So does not wearing sunglasses. Women who don’t protect their eyes from the sun are sure to regret it later. Big UV400 sunglasses protect the eyes and skin.
Regular exercise is good, but excessive exercise, more than four hours of stamina training a week, can damage cells and muscle tissue, and lead to osteoporosis. Regular, moderate exercise is one of the contributors to longevity.
Armed with the right grocery list, women mired in the winter doldrums might be able to fight back with food to lift their mood. First on the list is Go Fish!
If the blues are gathering round, cook up some salmon, tuna, sardines or other oily fish. Their high levels of omega-3 fatty acids have been shown to fight depression and, moodiness. Plant foods like as flaxseed, soybean oil, walnuts and canola oil are also high in omega-3s, so look for recipes that include them.
Egg on a good mood with-eggs. It’s not just the egg whites, whipped into meringue toppings that make women smile. Actually the egg yolks are the best source of dietary lecithin, which is essential for brain function and affects not only mood, but also memory and concentration.
Forgetting where the keys are, putting the cat out and the trash in, or just having trouble finding the right word, can kick off the worry, “Is it an early sign of Alzheimer’s?”
Over four million Americans suffer from the mind-robbing disease and the number is growing. Since there is no cure, and because age is the primary risk factor, it is ultimately an equal opportunity disease. More women than men have Alzheimer’s, but only because women generally live longer.
Many midlife women go through perimenopause and menopause experiencing an occasional hot flash as a minor annoyance and don’t seek over the counter or prescription remedies. For some, the hot flashes and night sweats are so severe they can’t sleep, resulting in daytime fatigue and anxiety that affects the quality of their lives.
“Natural” or herbal remedies like black cohosh or medically prescribed hormone replacement therapy have been the traditional options for the treatment of menopausal symptoms. But, the release five years ago of a major study linking hormone replacement therapy with increased risk of heart disease, breast cancer and other serious effects created a wave of confusion and concern about the topic.